i don't even want it from the start! who said i like you anyway?!
i decline right? why do i accept it now? at first you told me you'll only use me for your own please, i took the risk cause i thought you worth it, i pity you and help you with that fucking business. Well your plan didn't work, again i didn't care until you ask me out? i think and ask myself? do i look easy on him? it's just a week or two, since he 's turned down then he'll come to me? nah maybe he's just confused, i accepted that thinking he'll over come this things, i let him do what ever he wanna do, he even met my parents God what am i thinking. My friends are starting to be awkward with us so i made a gap and line between friends and yeah him. i admit i almost like him i almost quote that, it all change in a certain point where i yeah read and heard something that made my blood boil. I almost even die with guiltiness knowing that i can't reciprocate his feelings. shit i'm so fucking stupid, i wish i didn't let myself fall for his plans i wish this hard feelings go away. i'm not saying i like him, just ughhhh i really feel stupid.
yeah now i don't even recognize him as someone i met long time ago. I don't even care, he don't even know why i'm angry, apparently he asked why but i didn't respond well i don't care just leave me alone! i may not be as pretty as they are, do you hear anything from me? did i offend you? i even take your offer. i'm ashamed that i let this shit go deeper. yeah think things like, i hate you, i hope you rote in your own misery ! call me vain! evil or anything you want just fucking go out of my life. i may regret this but just please stop hurting others! stop using innocent people for your own good. but in the end i'll just accept that, that's how you are.
you're kind sweet we all know that but seeking love wont work why don't just wait for it, maybe someday you'll be happy too, without offending somebody else. learn to love yourself first, as i see you care for others more than yourself to the point that you let them hurt you.
Sorry if i hurt you i know and i can feel your pain and thank you for the things you made just for once i feel special. if you love that girl much why don't win her back again i'm sure she'll be happy.
i know you want to start all over, i just can't let you the fact that i really don't feel anything for you is an enough proof, why don't make yourself happy. i thought i'll like you back as the time goes by. you're my FRIEND since we're in grade school don't you think that's enough yeah i do love you, i love you as my friend i don't want you to get hurt that's why i'm avoiding you sorry i'm coward to face this problems.
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